Thursday, August 30, 2007

Naked Beer Heist Conspiracy

I gotta give these red necks props for originality but they need some work on the execution end of things. According to police, two red necks planned a beer heist thusly at 5:30 a.m. for Fish's Quick Stop in DeSoto, MO:

Red Neck #1: Ok, ok. Here's the deal. I get naked.
Red Neck #2: Right.
RN #1: So I'm naked with a mask on my head swinging my stuff at the store clerk.
RN #2: Brilliant! Ok, what am I doing? Am I naked too?
RN #1: No goofus. You're stealing the beer while I got the woman distracted with my schlong. You just grab a case and we're out the door. She won't know what hit her.
RN #2: What kind of beer?
RN #1: Bud stupid. We're Bud men.
RN #2: Right, right. ... Let's do it!

Unfortunately for Luke and Bo Duke, a sharp eyed patron got the license plate number on the General Lee as our two heroes made their getaway. Above is a picture of Red Neck #1 streaking from the Quick Shop @ 5:31 a.m., towel over head. They were arrested a few days later. If you have the stomach for it, here is a link to the video on Youtube.

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