Blue State-Red State Segregated Toilets

Back in the day, restroom facilities were segregated by race. Perhaps we need to go back to the future. First we have Republican Florida State Rep. Bob Allen who, in the restroom of a public park, solicited a male undercover police officer to receive oral sex from Rep. Allen. In his defense, Allen contends he was intimidated by the large black police officer and, due to his fear, made the offer of oral sex. Link. A big misunderstanding according to Allen. According to 365gay.com, Allen is a longtime foe of LGBT rights in Florida. Yesterday news broke that Republican Sen. Larry Craig (pictured) plead guilty to lewd conduct in the restroom of the Minneapolis airport. Craig is alleged to have solicited sexual conduct from an undercover police office who was in the stall next to him. According to Craig, the officer misunderstood his action and he only plead guilty to make the matter go away. Link; see the Craig police report here. I'm sure the people of Idaho will forget all about it when the senator is up for re-election next year. Last year, when gay blogger Mike Rogers alleged that Craig had engaged in same-sex relations, Craig called the story "absolutely ridiculous, almost laughable." Link. More on Sen. Craig from BlogActive.

We at Conspiracy Theory Central are now afraid to visit public restrooms for fear of being confronted by elected Republican officials seeking gay sex. We cannot sit in the stall comfortably doing nature's business when lurking nearby may be the next Rep. Allen or Sen. Craig. The only answer to this epidemic is to segregate the public toilets of America by political affiliation. Red doors with elephants for the Republicans and blue doors with donkeys for all sane Americans. The red toilets will be free fire zones where sexually repressed Republicans may let their inherent urges flow amongst their own kind.

Red State Update's take on the Sen. Larry Craig situation: