Tuesday, October 23, 2007

Huckabee--The Looming Hippie Drug Abuse Medicare Crisis

First, a few thoughts on the candidacy of Gov. Michael Huckabee for president of the United States.

The Good: Likes to throw around the word "Islamofascism" in speeches. This is one of Conspiracy Theory Central's favorite words. Derived from the term "whopofascist" popularly applied to Italian dictator Gen. Benito Mussolini in the 1930s. The first whopofascist was Julius Caesar. Back to Huckabee. Lost 110 pounds while governor of Arkansas. Baptist minister who plays guitar in a rock and roll band. Chuck Norris just endorsed him.

The Bad: Can we have a president named Huckabee? Sounds too much like hillbilly. And he's from Arkansas, the land of Clinton. Even freakier, Huckabee was born in Hope, Arkansas, the birthplace of Bill Clinton. Conspiracy Theory Central has crunched the numbers and determined it's a near mathematical certainty that two people born in Hope, Arkansas within a decade of each other are related.

Recent Mike Huckabee quote: "And we've got a situation with 10,000 baby boomers a day signing up for Social Security, going into the Medicare system. And I just want to remind everybody when all the old hippies find out that they get free drugs, just wait until what that's going to cost out there." Link. Huckabee is spot on this issue. If someone as brain dead as Rush Limbaugh can figure out how to abuse prescription medications, whatya wanna bet the hordes of aged hippies rolling into the medicare system are going to figure out how to milk the system for a taxpayer supplied eternal buzz? This is an issue that frosts Conspiracy Theory Central's cock! Why can't the godforsaken old hippies just sit in their nursing homes and suffer like normal patriotic Americans? We can breath just a tad easier knowing Mike Huckabee is sounding the clarion call against the onset of the looming hippie drug abuse medicare tsunami.

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